My Life in Advertising, with Johnny Bottles, Executive Creative Director at Shanghai hot shop “Twizzle”
The reason I got into advertising was… I specialise in weapons and entertainment. Also, I’m on the sex offenders register.
The campaign I’m most proud of working on is… “My Other Car is a Wham Bar” for Wham Bars. It seriously changed consumer behaviour in the 10p chew bar segment.
And the campaign I pretend I wasn’t responsible for is… “Wham Bazzar”, a poorly thought out Turkish themed campaign for Wham Bars. It really fucked up consumer behaviour in the 10p chew bar segment. Those pricks at Refreshers were rubbing their hands with glee.
The best moment of my career so far was… Joining Sweatbox gym and discovering that it’s not just a gym. It’s also an anal play arena.
While the most embarrassing moment was… Being recognised in Soho all the time. I can’t have a drink without being hassled. I mean, hey, I’m not a celebrity. I just make ads. Fucking cool ads, but ads none the less. People keep wanting to shake my hand and I keep saying “Hey, I’m just a regular guy. Just like you.”
The best celebrity I’ve worked for on a campaign is… Pat Sharp, ex-host of late 80s/early 90s kids TV show “Fun House”. He really is just as outrageous in person. Not many people know that his real name is actually “Patrick Sharpin”.
The person I’d most like to work within the industry is… an 18 year old intern who will do anything to further her career.
The person who’s had the biggest influence on my career is… Bob Monkhouse. Or Bob Hoskins. I always get them confused.
The best piece of advice I’ve received during my career is… Phone 07894393484 for the most potent sherbert dib dab you’ve ever dibbed. Or dabbed, for that matter.
If i wasn’t working in advertising, I’d be… Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands
In ten years’ time, I’ll be… Still thinking about anagrams for the word “engagement”. So far I’ve got “menage gent” and “mean egg net”, and I hope to come up with a few more over the coming decade.